They eat lobsters don’t they?

lobsterA look at The Lobster (MA)…

Right, so it’s the future, not space-age future just a little bit future, and if you’re single you get sent to The Hotel where you’ve got 45 days or something to couple-up or you’ll be turned into an creature of your choosing.

The main person, 101 (that’s his room number) played by Colin Farrell, says if things don’t turn out on the love front then he’ll be a lobster please because they live a long time and are always fertile. (And yummy 101.)

There’s other stuff at the hotel like you have to go out to the woods with a tranquiliser gun and shoot Loners who are people who dress in bulky raincoats. And all the men in The Hotel must wear the same outfit – a sensible shirt, slacks and coat ensemble – and the women all wear a jaunty flowery dress. You’ll have what they’re having.

There’s romance – like there’s one pretty woman (Jessica Barden) who has a nosebleed issue. One of 101’s friends – a man with a limp (Ben Whishaw) – decides a good way to attract her would be to develop a bloody nose. So he smashes his snout on a bedside table. It’s a lovely scene that will be played over and over like the one from When Harry Met Sally. I’ll have what she’s having.

There are other good cast members in this ‘dark comedy’ from director Yorgas Lanthimos like Rachel Weisz, About a Boy and Ashley Jensen, the one from Extras and Ugly Betty.

Not recommended for • a date • a cheerful night out away from the kids • those in need of a lift in spirit.

Consider if • you’ve been too happy lately • you want to remind yourself or someone else that a night home with the kids isn’t that bad.

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