Teeing off as a non-entity in Britain’s big golf classic by Richard Jones

A look at The Phantom Of The Open

 Not everyone has a fancy for sports movies or even those based loosely around sports events. But director Craig Roberts has assembled a great cast to tell the story of Maurice Flitcroft, a real-life character who somehow wrangled his way into the 1976 qualifying rounds of the world-famous British Open golf classic.

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Falcons clear away

• Mark Hamilton marks in defence for West Perth. Photos by Les Everett

WAFL round 16

The top of the table clash at Arena Joondalup ended with a comfortable winning margin for the Falcons but it was still a worthy encounter. The Sharks led at half time and were down by just seven points at the last change. The worry was that they scored just one goal in the second half.

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Thunder roars and there’s a draw

WAFL round 15

• Sam Sturt slams through a six pointer. Photos by Les Everett

The history making meeting between East Perth and Peel led me to East Fremantle Oval despite the game between first and third also being within walking distance. While I missed the first WAFL draw in 10 years there was still plenty of interest at the neutral venue where the finals aspirations of the Royals dived.

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Sharks turfed out of top spot

WAFL round 14

If you see any “genuine WACA turf” up for sale on eBay the chances are 1. it’s real and 2. it’s been put up by South Fremantle midfielders Haiden Schloithe (1) or Jarrod Doney (5). It was wet at the WACA for the derby and midfielders got a taste of what footy used to be like. For the Sharks it was like the derby has been for years now with the Bulldogs notching their 14th win in a row over their cross-town rivals. It was over pretty quickly too with East Fremantle scoreless in the first quarter and South kicking the first five goals of the game. Schloithe was brilliant, Doney dogged, Dylan Main kicked four goals and Toby McQuilkan again showed great judgment in defence. Kyle Baskerville battled in out for the Sharks and Alex Montauban scored three goals from very limited opportunities (four kicks).

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Legendary Parisian detective unravels details of brutal crime by Richard Jones

A look at Maigret (M)

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Down the decades I’ve seen a number of movie actors play the role of the famous Paris detective, Commissaire Jules Maigret. Most recently Rowan Atkinson was Maigret in four TV epics, but I also recall Richard Harris and the great Charles Laughton stumbling around in the Parisian underworld.

Atkinson was retained for only four telemovies and he always looked slightly comical – not as much, of course, as when he was Mr. Bean – playing Maigret with a pipe clenched between his teeth.

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Many voices inside her by Song List Rat

The beautiful gogan goddess came down like a wolf on the fold and ate the weekend. On the way she stopped at the bakery in Mt Barker and ate some pies. Then she ate the Kingdom of Denmark. Her chariot was a pick-up truck filled with a cracker of a band. What was left of the town she nailed in a coffin and buried. She wailed a musical epitaph but vowed on her return to restore the Kingdom to normal. Or so the legend goes. 

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