In early 1993 I drove from Carnarvon to Melbourne ostensibly to see my beloved Fitzroy play some footy. The great unfenced lunatic asylum that is the North West was eating my soul.
When I hit Flemington I drove right past Iggy Pop and Sonic Youth at the Big Day Out to the Sara Sands Hotel in Brunswick and saw my heroes Died Pretty. While the Roy Boys performed admirably and just missed out on finals, the pubs of Fitzroy were winners. Fitzroy was the live music capital of the world. The Black Eyed Susans at the Prince Patrick. Robert Forster and Custard at the Punters Club. Lisa Miller and Truckasaurus at the Standard.
One night at the Baker’s Arms, I saw a band billed as ‘lilting on the sad side of dangerous’. I felt like Roy Orbison when he first saw Elvis, “a shocking and awe-inspiring performance”.
The Dirty Three were off the richter as they say. Not only did the room shake but my whole body palpated for hours afterwards. I saw them regularly over the next two years before they went on to conquer the world. However over the last 20 years they rarely played due to the other musical or artistic projects of the three members.
On a Saturday night in June 2024 the Dirty Three took the stage at the Fremantle Passenger Terminal to rapturous anticipation. New album Love Conquers Everything was released the day prior. Warren Ellis is resplendent in his hobo chic suit and wild wizard beard. His violin cringing like a dog about to be deprived of its ball by its loving owner.
Warren has banter aplenty. Jim White and Mick Turner prefer to let their instruments speak. Two songs in and Warren is a sweat ball with his pants sliding off his greasy buttocks. He calls for a belt and the punter to my right gives up his rawhide.
Song after song wails, whines and whips but the pants stay up. Warren, emboldened by his new belt, rants at length against Billy Joel and his muzak. His eyes dance from the crowd to would-be stage objects to jump on. The speakers are spared tonight. Horse hair is flying off the violin bow. It’s close to death. Warren looks closer and when he drops to the floor, all hands reach for the automatic AED. Luckily it’s just a short repose on the floor. Warren is up and announces Sue’s Last Ride (or it’s a bummer that you died ) will be the top charting Christmas song in 2024 on Triple J.
• Photo by Song List Rat
The Dirty Three leave to heaving applause. Warren hands the belt back soaked in sweat. It should be on a plinth in the Australian Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
The Dirty Three that night were the greatest band on planet earth and they should be embalmed.
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